Thursday, October 28, 2010

Death by Orgasm and other Halloween treats!

It's Halloween! The time of year when we can become someone else, and let our alter ego come out and play! What better time to take advantage of the fact that you have the freedom to be sexy, slutty, or even a bit naughty without explanation.

Adult toys are designed for use throughout the year, but at holiday time the toys get even more festive! Check out the Death by Orgasm collection from LoveHoney. PLUS, play their online game here!

The Fang Banger is my favorite toy in this collection, even though I love the coffin boxes that the other vibes are packaged in! Check out the awesome description for this vibrating couples ring. (Twilight fans everywhere will be begging for one of these.)

It's the best way to enjoy sex with another being - alive or undead! If your sexual desires are as strong as your blood-lust, slide this rich red cock ring over his stiff love stake and the vibrating fangs will make you scream... with pleasure!

Slide the skin-safe Fang Banger over his manhood with the fangs pointing towards you. To activate the two vibrating bullets, simply press the button on each and feel coffin-shattering vibrations.

Made from skin-safe silicone. Does not contain latex, phthalates, garlic or anything else harmful to the living or the undead.

The perfect sexy supernatural accessory for every Fang Banger (people who enjoy sex with vampires). Biting optional.

Garlic-free. Undead-friendly. Holy Waterproof.

Uh, "yes, please!!"

The Scorpion is a bit scary, and the other vibes seem rather plain, but like they say, "It's all about the presentation." And all of these vibes will provide stimulating sensations for your fright night encounters.

More fun treats that were made for sexy tricks? The pirate Rub my Duckie and Devil Duckie!

These vibes are the perfect discreet toy for your playmate. They're waterproof, making them an ideal addition to your shower or bathtub should you decide to get a little frisky in the water.

So leave the candy to the kids, and grab some sexy fun for your night free from virtue or duty.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Am I a Cougar?!

There's been a lot of hype surrounding "cougars" in the past few years, Demi Moore has Ashton Kutcher, Courtney Cox had David Arquette, and there are websites popping up so that younger men and cougars can find each other. It seems as though it is almost a new trend to be a cougar, even though women (and men) have been "robbing the cradle" for years.

While I am halfway through my 30's, I am hardly an older woman. I was recently at a bar dancing with some friends and young guys who were celebrating one of their birthdays, and I was asked by another guy who was watching us why I was dancing with someone who was clearly much younger than me.

I was taken aback for a moment that this guy was essentially offending me by calling me old, and then got annoyed that he was kind of calling me a "cougar!" My girlfriend heard the exchange of words, and defended him saying, "He just wanted to dance with you himself." So, his way of asking me to dance was to offend me. Nice.

I don't often dish out pick-up advice or single person bar etiquette, but I feel like the guys who are out at these bars are missing something.

To the single guy at the bar:
-I am a married woman who is out dancing at a bar.
-I am wearing my wedding ring, and will admit to being married if asked.
-I enjoy dancing A LOT.
-I do not like being groped while dancing, but do enjoy grooving or even "freaking" with you if vibe is right.
-I generally will gravitate toward a dance partner who is having fun, and is not concerned if they appear to be dorky.... these guys tend to be YOUNGER.
-Don't expect to get my number, since I am not looking to date or have an affair.
-Don't be upset when you ask for my number and I tell you I am married. I wasn't hiding anything from you the last hour we were dancing.

That being said, I must acknowledge that there is another party to address. The actual cougars themselves. Yes guys, there are married women out there who do want to take you home, maybe go on a date, and perhaps even participate in an affair. This comes from a lack of passion in their life, not just their marriage, and they are looking for you to fill the empty void that has now become their reality. Be gentle with them.

To the Cougars:
-The young men will scope out the bars for the hot young chicks first, then as the clock ticks and the booze flows, they will be drawn to your deeper sense of self confidence and willingness to enjoy yourself without fear of what others think.
-Don't drink too much, beer goggles go both ways!
-Don't shit where you sleep. Most likely you are in a bar where someone might actually know you or your husband. Be respectful of appearances to some degree. You can save all the inappropriate touching for later.
-Don't fall in-love. You're picking up a band-aid, not a replacement part. This guy will never fill your husband's shoes so don't expect him to.
-Understand the difference between sex and love.

This is a tough one since most likely you haven't had much of either in your life lately. Love is respectful, considerate, kind, and UNCONDITIONAL. Love knows who you are at puking from the stomach flu, and what's underneath the make-up and hair during your best moments. Love can understand that you have a need to feel beautiful, desirable and full of life. Which brings me to me next rant.

To the one who is left at home:
-If you are shocked by this advice, get over it.
-Your wife (or husband) was once young and appealing to the opposite sex.
-Sometimes, all that is needed is to be seen, to be acknowledged by someone other than you. We all have an ego, and we all have the need for attention, be it shallow or not.
-Don't think you can be the center of someone else's universe and then be shocked when it implodes.
-Try to give your partner the freedom to be sexy. You might be surprised and find that the more freedom you give them, the less inclined they are to use it.

Some men won't allow their wives out dancing with their girlfriends thinking that they might be tempted to stray from their marriage. Personally I find this rather condescending. I am not a child, and I am in control of what I do with my body.

I am equally saddened to hear women say they don't allow their husbands to go to a strip club or attend a Vegas bachelor party for the same reason.

Define the boundaries in your relationships, and trust that your partner is capable of keeping their promise to you. Infidelity happens, but the chances increase if one or the other feel trapped in their relationship. Keep an open line of communication and expect the best of each other.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Good 'ole penetration-with a few extras!

Let's face it gals, there's several thousand vibrators we can choose from to satisfy our desires, but for some of us, all it takes is some vibrating penetration. Just like the good 'ole days of medical treatment for hysteria, these vibes release stress and anxiety, allowing us to feel normal again.

But unlike the ancient vibes of our grandmothers, we have more options! Buying a vibrator these days is much like buying a car, you can choose your color, go for more green options to make less of a carbon footprint, automatic or manual transmissions, cruise control.... you get the idea.

For a thick and powerful ride, go for the Sassy Swirl!

A phthalate free vibe made of PVC, at the base I can just wrap my hand comfortably around the shaft. It has a bulbous tip perfect for clitoral or G spot stimulation, and is nearly 7" in length. On Cal Exotics website, they say it's quiet, but it's not the most subtle sound I've ever heard. It's definitely got some horsepower! It takes three AAA's and gives you low to high vibration, and has 10 different patterns of pulsation (thumping) and escalation (a gradual rise in intensity).

And check this out!
Talk about your options! This ride comes with a magic memory chip so that whatever your last setting was is saved for the next time you turn on your vibe! The bendable shaft can be torqued to wrap around the pelvic area giving grinders the clitoral attention they want while still having something to wrap their vaginal muscles around.

Want something a with a little less flash? Try the Liberte 1 from the Couture Collection.

This sleek vibrator is more slender than the Sassy Swirl and vibrates at a higher frequency. While it's only about 5" in length and as thick as a thick-handed man's thumb, it's added texture makes it completely capable of satisfying your needs.

With ONE BUTTON to control the vibration, it's simple to operate. However, if you accidentally turn it to a new setting and want to go back, you'll need to scroll through the options to find the one you liked.

The Liberte has a stiff shaft and is made of silicone, a higher grade material that is smooth and non-porous. With a little of your favorite lube, this vibe will have you melting like you're at the mercy of a lover's well-trained finger.